


About a Girl

by Phantomwriter1231



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M, Family, Romance, Science Fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-08
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-20 10:11:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14258742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantomwriter1231/pseuds/Phantomwriter1231
Summary: She was about 5, tall for her age and wise beyond her years. Her small face was framed by a curly auburn hair and decorated with expressing blue eyes. Had it not been for the fact that she'd boarded the ship during a Borg attack someone might've thought she was the Captain's daughter.Rated T, for Language. Beware, mild cursing.





	1. Part I

Part I

She was about 5, tall for her age and wise beyond her years. Her small face was framed by curly auburn hair and decorated with expressing blue eyes. Had it not been for the fact that she’d boarded the ship during a Borg attack someone might've thought she was the Captain’s daughter.

Naturally, she was nervous and afraid, suspicious of everyone around her. The doctor managed to remove almost 100% of the Borg technology in her body and now the child could go out and about as she pleased if it was inside Sick Bay. The incentive didn’t help, however, and she could often be found reading from a PADD the Doctor had given her, unnatural for a girl her age.

“Sick Bay to Captain Janeway,” the doctor spoke into his combadge.

“Janeway here,” came back the response.

“I was hoping you could swing by sometime, Captain. I have some news about our patient down here in Sick Bay.”

 “Very well, Doctor. I’ll be by as soon as my shift is over. Janeway out.”

The Doctor took in a breath and turned to look at the girl, crouched in the floor with PADD in hand. He moved towards the little girl, auburn hair covering her face.

“Okay, Elizabeth,” he said as softly as his subroutines allowed him to do so, “I’m going to work now, do you need anything else before I go inside my office?”

The child looked up. Piercing, blue eyes met the Doctor’s, clearly mortified by the girl’s reticence.

“I was hoping I could do more around here,” her squeaky voice came back, taking the hologram aback, as it was the first time he heard it.  

“First, you’ve got to meet Captain Janeway,” he answered.

“When can I do so?” the child questioned again.

“She will be here soon, I just spoke with her and she said she’d be coming by as soon as her shift was over.”

“Can I help you around here, then?”

“Hmmm, let me think. Do you know how to sterilize medical equipment?”

The girl nodded. “My mother was also a doctor, I used to help her all the time. But then the Borg came and assimilated the entire medical facility where we were.”

“How long ago was this?” asked the hologram as he passed the equipment to be sterilized and the solvent needed.

“Can’t say with accuracy but I believe it to be about two months ago.”

“Well, that certainly explains why the implants had not quite taken into your body yet. It was relatively simple to remove most of them without complications.”

“Complications?”

“Yes. Medicine comes with risks, I am assuming you know this. You seem like a very smart girl.” Elizabeth nodded, eyes holding the Doctor’s.

“What sort of risks?” she asked.

“Well, there is always the risk of losing a patient. But with the right care and medicine many can go on and live a full life. Medicine, Liz, is a very delicate subject. After all, you are responsible for somebody else’s life.” Elizabeth’s eyes moved down to the tray in front of her. She picked up a medical tricorder, sprayed some disinfectant and went ahead to clean the instrument.

“Do no harm.”

“Exactly.”

Just as they were talking, the titanium alloy double doors hissed opened , in came Captain Janeway. Immaculate as always, she looked like some sort of ‘superhero’ from one of the many twentieth-century comics Mr. Paris liked to read when it was his shift in sickbay and there was not a single patient to be seen. What was it? Wonder Woman? Then again, Mr. Paris liked the X-Men instead.

“Good afternoon, Doctor,” the gruff voice made child and hologram turn to Kathryn.

“Good afternoon, Captain.”

“I see your patient is already out and about. Remarkable work, Doctor, as always!”

“Thank you, Captain.”

“Do you mind if I have a word with her?”

“Not at all. Elizabeth, I am going to deactivate myself, if you need anything all you have to do is ask the computer to activate the EMH.” The girl nodded. “Computer, deactivate emergency medical holographic program.” And the Doctor vanished into thin air.

 

 

 

Kathryn was really hoping she didn’t fuck everything up with Elizabeth. She had been given background as to her finding on a deactivated Borg vessel, being the only survivor, her genetical makeup. She knew the child was human. She knew she was highly intelligent to be only five years old. And she knew she’d have a tough time letting go of the child when the moment came.

“What’s your name?” the woman began, measuring her words and tone carefully.

“Elizabeth, but you can call me Liz.  You must be Captain Janeway.”

“That I am. You can call me Kathryn if you’d like. How old are you, Elizabeth?”

“I am six years old, Captain,” answered the child with the utmost respect. Whomever had raised her had done a very good job of it.

“Tell me Liz, do you remember what happened before the Borg got to you?” Elizabeth nodded. “You want to tell me about it?”

“My mother was a Doctor back in the Alpha Quadrant. My father died when I was a baby, so she took over raising me by herself. She was sent to the Beta Quadrant to work at a research facility there for a few months. A week after, the facility was raided by the Borg. They assimilated most of the people there, they tried assimilating my mother, but she resisted, and they killed her. Then they assimilated me.”

“Okay, come here, Honey,” Kathryn opened her arms for the child whose face was now flooded with tears. She picked up the girl and drew her to her chest, protectively. “It’s alright, you’re alright.”

She wasn’t sure if it was her maternal instinct kicking in or what, but all she wanted to do was to take the child with her and protect her from every harmful thing in the galaxy. Impossible, she knew.

“Are you hungry?” she asked, trying to distract the child long enough to keep her from crying. Liz nodded, and Kathryn smiled. “Okay, then. Let’s go find you something to eat.”

Locked safely in Kathryn’s arms, Elizabeth buried her face on her shoulder as they cruised the long hallways that lead to the mess hall. There was something about this woman that reminded her oddly of her own mother. Things like the length and color of her hair, the size of her stride, or the same piercing, expressing look that she gave her every time she peaked over her shoulder.

In a way, it was like having her back, even if it was for only a determined amount of time. She knew that somewhere along the line she’d have to abandon _Voyager,_ and she was not pleased by the idea of leaving Kathryn or the Doctor behind.

As they walked through the hallways, she was sure people were staring, and she took further refuge in Kathryn’s arm by tightening her hold on her neck. Kathryn’s soft hand came to the small of her back to calm her.

“It’s alright, kiddo,” she said softly into Elizabeth’s ear, just like her mother used to do when she woke up at night with a nightmare. “They are only staring because we are not used to having children onboard, except for Naomi who was born here. You’ll like her.”

The double doors to the Mess Hall hissed open then shut as they entered it. Kathryn approached a man named Neelix, clad in an apron as he shuffled back and forward on the kitchen, making and serving food.

“Hello, Captain!” said the man as he kept shuffling in the galley.

“Hello Neelix. I need something delicious and nutritious for this cutie, and please, NO LEOLA ROOT!” The Talaxian was bewildered.

“Captain, you never told me you had a daughter.”

“That’s because I don’t, Neelix.”

“Well, she looks just like you! How can she not be your daughter?”

Panic struck Liz’s body and she held tighter to Kathryn.

“It’s alright, Sweetie. Neelix can we talk about this some other time, please?” the Talaxian assented and went on to give her a tray that Kathryn took with her only free hand.

Kathryn walked a couple feet to the closest open table and placed the tray down, then took a seat with Elizabeth still in arms. The little girl choked down a spoonful of soup, she was visibly upset. The woman thought and thought, looking for a small distraction to calm Elizabeth down.

“Liz, can you tell me something about your mum?” Elizabeth forked her vegetables from one place to the next, then left the fork aside.

“Her name was Katrina, you kind of look like her.”

“Coincidence much?”

“I don’t know, maybe.” Elizabeth took in another spoonful, “Maybe it’s your hair, or the way you walk, or maybe it’s your eyes. I don’t exactly know.”

“Why do you think your mum and I look so much alike?” the girl shrugged.

“Maybe she’s your twin sister?” Kathryn didn’t know what to say.

“I’m sorry Kiddo, I hate to say it, but I don’t have a twin. A sister yes, but she’s not my twin.”

“What’s her name?” Elizabeth took a forkful of veggies into her mouth and chewed it bright-eyed, waiting for an answer from her.

“Phoebe.”

“Do you miss her?”

“A little bit… A lot,” Kathryn corrected.

“And why are you out here, in the middle of nowhere?”

“It’s a long story, Kid,” Kathryn said softly as she took a sip of a coffee Neelix had prepared for her, “And it is kind of late. Tomorrow if you still want to hear it I’ll tell you, but for now, finish eating so that I can take you back to sickbay.”

“How long do I have to stay in sickbay?”

“I don’t know, Liz, but we can ask the Doctor as soon as I get you there. Why, you don’t like been in sickbay? Or is it the Doctor?”

“Sickbay,” the girl answered, she thought for a moment and asked if the Doctor had a name. Janeway snorted and looked at the child.

“He’s been trying to decide now for nearly six years.”

“Well, that’s a long time to pick a name, don’t you think so, Captain?”

“Yes, it is. I told him if he didn’t pick one already then, I would pick one for him. You should’ve seen his face.”

“Let me guess. Was he terrified?”

“Oh, he was!” Elizabeth started giggling and Kathryn joined in.

Never had Neelix seen the Captain this happy. From his spot in the galley, he observed as a very relaxed Janeway interacted with the little girl. He’d never seen her like this before. Around Naomi she was always sweet but tried hard to keep that thin line between Captaincy and Womanhood as thick as possible.

They looked like mother and daughter. The way Kathryn cared for her, the way she worried about a girl she’d just met. There was also the fact that they looked remarkably alike; blue eyes and auburn hair, the expressing eyes. There were too many coincidences.

The little girl was visibly upset when the Captain brought her in, but now she seemed almost completely fine. Her spirits were up, and she conversed with the Captain animatedly as she ate. The Captain was also visibly happy, smiling like he’d only seen been done to Chakotay. That very same smile she gave to Kes, or Sam, or Seven, and occasionally at Harry, too.

If Neelix had to guess on something, he’d probably guess that it was her maternal instincts kicking in; after all she was still in child-bearing age. She’d make an excellent mother, that was clear for anybody to see.

“Are you finished, Liz?” Kathryn asked softly as she looked at the child. Elizabeth nodded, “Okay then, let’s take you back to sickbay.”

“Do I have to?”

“Well, at least we got to ask the Doctor if you’re ready to leave.” The child extended her little arms in a gesture to be picked up. Kathryn did so, still dumbfounded by how light she was, despite been tall for her age. She picked the tray in her hands and dumped it in the recycle bin, then started walking towards the hallway.

She came into sickbay to find a beaten up Chakotay and a very angry hologram. He had bruises all over his body and Kathryn could swear she could see a bruise already starting to turn blue around the Commander’s left eye.

“This wouldn’t happen if you desisted from displaying that forsaken holoprogram!” The Doctor admonished as he cleaned a small cut on his lips.  Chakotay hissed and pulled back.

“What happened?!” Kathryn heard herself say, a little louder than what she would have liked. She placed Liz on the closest biobed and walked over to her friend and coworker.

“Nothing,” Chakotay started but was interrupted by an apoplectic Doctor.

“NOTHING?! NOTHING HE SAYS?!”

“Alright, calm down Doctor. You are scaring Elizabeth. Chakotay, care to tell me what the hell is going on?” Janeway mediated.

“I had some time allotted in the Holodeck and I needed to blow off some steam…”

“So, you opened the boxing holoprogram.”

“Except that Tom tampered with it and I took a beating.”

“Well, I can see that! How do you feel, Commander?”

“Like I was hit by a plasma storm.”

“Considerable due to the extent of these injuries,” her hand went over to clean a cut on his forehead. Chakotay winced but did not pulled away.  The Doctor had retired to his office to work on some culture samples, leaving the two of them and Liz alone.

Kathryn turned around to look at the girl, sitting still on the biobed and looking intently at them.

“Liz, do you want to help me cure the Commander’s injuries?” The little girl said nothing, but Kathryn saw her face and eyes light up, “Here, Honey, go get me that little cylinder over there by the microscope, please.” Elizabeth jumped from the biobed and did as told.

Once she was back, she handed the cylinder to Kathryn, who, before going over to Chakotay, showed her the device.

“This is a dermal regenerator. The Doctor uses it to heal cuts such as this one, on the Commander’s forehead.”

“How does it work?”

“It has a tiny light. You see, down here. All you must do is point it at the wound and activate it for a few seconds.” Kathryn went ahead to demonstrate with Chakotay, setting a hand on his shoulder and right over his heart to steady him down and prevent him from moving.

Chakotay knew it as soon as he took the first punch. Tom had tampered with the safety controls again and had altered the holoprogram so that he could not override it until the match was over. Damn him! Now he was sitting on a biobed in sickbay, beaten like a prune and trying to mute out the Doctor’s protest over the boxing holoprogram.

He felt the sting of the hydrogen peroxide on his lower lip, hissed and pulled back. The hiss of the titanium double doors brought up his attention and he saw an image of Kathryn he had never seen before. She came in, majestic and entrancing, carrying in her arms a little girl of 5 or 6.

The resemblance was enormous. They were like two peas in a pod. If the Commander had not known better, he would say she was Kathryn’s daughter. But he did know better, and he knew the Captain, and Kathryn Janeway did not had children.

She was a sight to see, though, maternal and all. He had other few instances when he would see that Kathryn; with B’Elanna, or Kes, or Sam, or Seven…and occasionally with Harry and Tom; especially with Harry and Tom.

“What happened?!” Chakotay tried answering but the Doctor cut in ranting about the incident. Kathryn calmed him down and asked him to let her take it from there.

From the other biobed he noticed the little girl, whom he caught the name of as Elizabeth, looking intently at both. As always, he looked up at Kathryn in the eye.

“How do you feel, Commander?” she asked, that continuous hint of longing in her eyes.

“Like I was hit by a plasma storm,” said he, heartbeat quickening and blood pressure rising.

“Considerable, due to the extent of these injuries.” Chakotay could not say whether she had let out a sigh of tiredness or a sigh of relief. He liked to think it was relief and not tiredness. He liked to think she cared about him just as much as he cared about her.

It touched his heart when he saw her include the little girl on their silent dialogue, asking her to bring her over the dermal regenerator. The scene was truly sweet and a welcome sight. She was born to be a mother and not to be floating in space for Spirits know how long.  Chakotay saw between them a bond that was far beyond what she allowed herself to go over. With Naomi and Icheb, as well as the rest of the Borg children, she was sweet, but she strived to maintain the thin line that separated the woman and the Captain.

Once his injuries were mostly healed, he asked if he could return to his quarters. Kathryn nodded and commed Tuvok and Ayala to help him get there.

While they got there, Kathryn introduced him to the little girl. She was shy at first, but slowly he made her laugh, which also made Kathryn smile. That smile to him meant everything. He did not get to have the girl this time, but one look from her and he could die happy. He kept eye contact with her; that continuous, perfectly synchronized, silent dialogue always existent between the two of them. That smile and reaffirming touch on the shoulder, right above the heart, as if saying: “I trust you, with all my life and being.”

 

 

A few minutes after Tuvok and Ayala had taken the Commander back to his quarters, she was still in sickbay with Liz. The Doctor said she was well enough to leave sickbay if she so desired but recommended Kathryn not introducing her to the rest of the crew just yet. She was still weak and had some recovering to do from the very grueling procedure that was removing the implants from her very small body.

“Alright, Kiddo, guess you’re coming home with me!” The little girl jumped up and down full of happiness. “Alrighty, let’s go, Monkey. We’ve got to replicate you some pajamas and a toothbrush.” Kathryn grabbed her hand and started out into the hallway. Liz froze at once.  Kathryn inspected the panic-stricken face of the girl, pale as a ghost.

“Come on, Honey. It’s all right.” She picked Liz up, to which she curled her arms and legs around her waist and neck. Kathryn took a hand and placed it softly on top of her lower back, reaffirming her.

“Too many people,” the girl whispered.

“I know, Sweetheart. Let’s go home, okay. It’s just you and me there.” Kathryn felt the slight pressure of Liz’s head as she nodded, “Close your eyes, Love. It won’t be long until we’re there.”

Kathryn kept walking, took the turbolift one deck up and walked to the room denominated “Captain’s Quarters” right next to Chakotay’s. She entered the four-digit code and the doors slid open with a mixture of hiss and smoke, a sign that engineering was working on something.

“Alright, Honey, you may open your eyes now.” She said softly, but the girl did not budge. Kathryn looked over her shoulder; the girl was fast asleep. She smiled and walked away to her bedroom. She put Liz to bed and walked out into the living room to find Chakotay there.

“Hey, sorry to barge in like that, the door was open,” he said with an apologetic look on his face.

“Don’t worry about it, I needed my best friend to talk to anyway.”

“About Elizabeth?” Kathryn nodded.

“She’s a nice kid, and she’s all alone. Her parents are dead, and she looks a lot like me. Neelix even thought she was my daughter.”

“I don’t blame him, Kathryn. You two are the spitting image of each other.”

“That’s a lot of coincidences.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Her mother’s name was Katrina.” Chakotay’s jaw dropped to the floor, “She says I look a lot like her.”

“Yeah, no shit. Are you sure you don’t have a twin in some other very twisted timeline?” She shook her head.

“I am completely sure, or she would’ve told me something. We’ve taken to each other very quickly.”

“Do you feel like you have to be there for her?”

“It’s this urge I have to protect her. I don’t know if it is my maternal instincts kicking in or what, but I want to.”

A sudden squeal coming from the bedroom made Kathryn snap to her feet and run there, only to find a very scared Liz sitting at the edge of the bed, crying and sweaty. Kathryn went and picked her up in her arms. She was trembling, scared out of her mind.

“Hey, it’s okay, Sweetie. It’s all right, Love. I am here. Come back to me, please?” The little girl calmed down a little but was still nervous. She brought her back to the main room, where Chakotay awaited with a glass of cold water in hand. He handed it to her and she in turn handed it to the child, still trembling in her arms.

“Here, Honey, drink this.”

“What is it?” Liz asked still scared out of her mind.

“It’s just water, Baby.” She watched as Liz choked down a mouthful, then took the cup as she handed it back, burying her face on the crook of her neck. She sat on the couch by the viewport and took a gray blanket Chakotay handed her. Kathryn mouthed a thank you, a slight smile across her face as she covered the girl with it.  

“No problem. Hit the bulkhead if you need me.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you, Commander.”

Kathryn waited for the Commander to walk out, tracking every single step with her eyes. Then her attention turned to Elizabeth, wrapped in the gray blanket and head buried in the crook of Kathryn's neck.

“Are you awake?” she asked carefully and softly. Liz nodded. “Can you look at me, Honey?” Liz pulled her face from her neck to look at Kathryn. There were some tear streaks running down her cheeks. Kathryn wiped them away.

“There, all better,” she said, “Can I get a smile?” Only a small one was the answer. “Oh, come on Darling, I know you can do better.” Elizabeth’s face lit up. Kathryn smiled back and pulled her to her chest. “Okay, Kiddo, time for bed.”

From the comfort of the bed, Elizabeth waited for Kathryn to return from the bathroom. She looked around her. Aside from the bed, there was little to no furniture, only a small bookcase and a wine-colored armchair. The bookcase was filled to the very last rack of paperback books, all assorted colors and sizes, but neatly stacked by size.

Curiosity overwhelmed her, and she stood up from the bed and walked the very short distance to the bookshelf. Running her small fingers over the spines she read the titles one by one, all classics. One caught her eye and she found herself pulling it out of the shelf.

The spine and the cover read _Great Expectations._

Elizabeth sat on the wine-colored armchair, crossed her legs, and opened the book. It caught her attention so much that she lost notion of time and space and got lost in her reading.

“What are you reading?” Kathryn’s soft and husky voice coming from the door pulled her out of that wonderfully well written piece.

“ _Great Expectations,_ how long have you been standing there?”

“A while, but it appears Dickens has caught your attention in a way that you didn’t hear me coming in,” Kathryn walked inside, “Aren’t you a little too young to know how to read? I mean, children your age are barely starting to learn.”

“Traveling along with mom I had a lot of downtime, and she insisted I learned it young, that way would be easier to fit in when we came back.”

“Well, I like it when a girl like you likes reading. But now it’s time for bed, Little One. You can continue reading it in the morning.”

“Aww, but I was just getting to the good part!”

“No buts, young lady, off to bed with you!”

“Will you be coming too?”

“Well, where else would I sleep?”

 

It was the nicest dream he’d had all week. There was her, back on New Earth. Heavenly blue eyes looking back at him, a profound love and adoration in them. Their hands joined as they sat in the same position in front of one another and told each other they were in love with them. She’d said, “I love you.” She’d kissed him and, oh, his heart almost imploded.

The constant beeping of the alarm forced the Commander to open his eyes. He twisted and groaned awake, kicked the standard-issue covers and jumped out of bed.  He walked straight to the replicator.

“Coffee, black.” Damn. Hanging out with Kathryn for seven years had imprinted in him certain habits that were extremely difficult to break, starting with the way he took his coffee. Hell, starting with him drinking coffee in the first place.

Chakotay watched as his order materialized in front of him. He took it and sipped from it, burning his bruised lower lip in the process.

“Ow, damn it!” he complained, but was stopped by the buzzing of the doorbell. “Come!”

The door slid open and there she appeared, impeccable as always, with a tremulous smile.

“Hey,” she said, “I came to see you before heading off to the bridge. Wanted to make sure you were okay. How are you feeling?”

“Like I was hit by a plasma storm. I should be better off in a few days.”

“Well, you heard what the Doctor said, one week of rest at the very least. You got beat up pretty bad.”

“Well, do something for me?”

“Depends on whether is on my power.”

“Tell Lieutenant Paris that, when I see him, I’ll give him a beating that’ll make him wish it was B’Elanna beating him instead of me.”

“Ow,” she chuckled, “Poor guy. Don’t worry, I’ll tell him. I must get to work; would you mind keeping an eye on Elizabeth? I left her all set up, but just in case she needs anything, I told her she could knock on your door and ask for help.”

“Sure, no problem. I’ll keep an eye out for her, don’t worry.”

“Thank you,” she said placing a hand on his shoulder, right above his heart, “I don’t know what I would do without you.” And she walked out, leaving him alone.

Kathryn Janeway stood in the bridge looking into empty space. She was there, yet she was not really there. What would not she give to feel the sudden adrenaline rush of a good, old red alert right about now! She needed to stop overthinking and doubting everything she did and say.

The earlier night Liz woke up with another nightmare. This time it was different, and she had called Kathryn ‘Mommy.’ She was sure it was an unconscious response, but it had planted a doubt in her mind and put into words the weird feeling that had prompted her to bring Liz to her quarters with her. Now, she could not wait for her shift to end so she could see her.

Tom laughed when she had given him Chakotay’s message. He promised her he would not alter his boxing holoprogram again and that he’d avoid him for a couple of weeks until he forgot about it.

After some time of inaction in the bridge, she decided to go to her ready room. The work load was lighter than the usual, and she soon found herself staring into space from the viewport.

The doorbell sound got her attention.

“Come in!” she said, and the doors unlocked. Chakotay stood there. “Commander! What are you doing here?”

“Well, there’s a little someone who wanted to see you,” from behind Chakotay, a little head popped up, and Kathryn’s militant stance dissolved to reveal a tender version of her. She smiled, and the little girl ran to her. She opened her arms to receive her and picked her up, nestling her in her hip.

“Hey, Sweetie, how's your day?”

“Good,” the squeaky voice came back, “Commander Chakotay helped me replicate some books.”

“Really?” Kathryn shot a quick look at Chakotay, standing in the doorway with hands in his pocket.

“Well, I did notice you didn’t have many children’s books in your shelf, so…”

“Thank you,” she mouthed and turned to Elizabeth. “What books did you got?”

“I got _Mary Poppins_ and _Alice in Wonderland.”_

“Really? My mum used to read me those when I was a kid.”

“Can we read them tonight? Please?” Kathryn was caught offhand.

“Uh… sure, Honey.” The woman looked up to Chakotay still standing there, watching her interaction with Elizabeth. “Thank you, Commander. I’ll take it from here.” He nodded and walked out. As always, her eyes lingered there a second too long.

“You like him, don’t you?”

“Huh?”

“Commander Chakotay, you like him, don’t you?” Shit. Years of keeping her feelings cooped up just so that a six-year-old could see right through here in a matter of seconds?

“Uh.” She was speechless.

“Please, the truth. I hate lies.” Added Elizabeth.

“Well… uuhm, Honey… Our relationship is kind of complicated.”

“Complicated?”

“Yeah, he is my best friend, my right hand. I trust him with my life...”

“Yes, I know, but do you love him?”

“Uh, yes. But there’s a lot more to us than that…”

“Does he love you?”

“Yes. He does.” Kathryn sighed.

“Then, what’s so complicated?”

“If the Commander and I were to be together, Kid, then we would be breaking the rules. It would interfere with my ability to command _Voyager._ ”

Just as she finished the sentence, her comm came alive with Tuvok's voice.

“Bridge to Captain Janeway!”

“What is it, Lieutenant?”

“Captain, long range sensors are detecting extremely high nutrino emissions accompanied by an intermittent graviton flux approximately three light years away.”

“I’ll be right there, Lieutenant. Janeway out,” she looked at the girl. “Alright, Kiddo, I got to get out there. Are you up for meeting the Bridge Crew?”

“Uhm… you think they’ll like me?”

“I’m sure they’ll love you,” she leaned in and placed a kiss on Elizabeth’s cheek, “Now come on.”

Kathryn walked out into the bridge, Elizabeth still cradled on her hip.

“Captain on the bridge!” Tuvok barked as soon as he saw her. Everybody stood to look at her as she came in.

“As you were,” she said softly, “Status.”

“The emissions are occurring at the center of the nebula. There appear to be hundreds of distinct sources.” Seven reported looking at the readings on her cconsole.

“Which could translate to hundreds of wormholes,” added Harry.

“The radiation is interfering with our sensors, but if Ensign Kim’s enthusiasm turns out to be justified, it would be the most concentrated occurrence of wormholes ever recorded.”

“Any idea where they lead?” Janeway chimed in.

“Not yet,” Harry replied, “But if just one of them leads to the Alpha Quadrant…”

“Who knows, Harry? It might take us right into your parent’s living room...” Paris mocked.

“Alter course, Mr. Paris.” She ordered and turned to Harry with a smug smile, “Ensign, when you speak to your mother, tell her we might need her to move the sofa.”

For a few minutes everything was normal, although they were still taking readings and scans.  The boys talked about trivial stuff as she sat in the Captain’s chair with Elizabeth sitting in her lap. She was laughing at one of Tom’s jokes.

“Maybe Chell should add ‘nebula soup’ to his menu.”

“Shields?” Kathryn asked looking behind her.

“Holding,” Tuvok replied. Kathryn tapped her comm.

“Bridge to Astrometrics.”

“Go ahead,” Seven’s monotonous voice came back, loud and clear.

“Any more data on those neutrino emissions?”

“Negative, Captain. I still can’t get a clear scan.”

“Distance to the center?”

“Six million kilometers,” answered Seven.

Someone called her name and she turned around.

“What is it?”

“I’m detecting a tritanium signature bearing 324, mark 55,” Tuvok barked back.

“Whatever it is, is too close,” Paris added.

“Evasive maneuvers!” She spat and took a PADD Chakotay handed her.

“Is it a ship?” He asked looking at Tuvok intently.

“Possibly,” the Vulcan said, his usual veneer of calm on his face.

“Captain, there’s another tritanium signature right above us,” out of the fog came a Borg Cube.

“Tom!” Kathryn yelled, and they ducked beneath it, “Get us out of here, now!”

Elizabeth recognized the Borg Cube a mile away and panicked. It was all a blur, but she could see people moving at warp speed and taking battle stations with the efficiency of the Borg Collective. She felt her airways close as she heard Kathryn yell at Tom to get them out of there. The next thing she remembered she was back in sickbay, lying on a biobed with a very worried Kathryn Janeway hovering over her.

“Well, she appears fine now, nothing physical wrong with her. Although we could have benefitted from a counselor onboard.” The Doctor remarqued as he put his tricorder away.

“The nature of our mission did not require one. We were only supposed to be gone for three weeks. And now, with Neelix gone, I’m afraid we may just have to find ourselves one.”

“Well, I do have some background in Psychology. I could ask ensign Vorik to help me download such subroutines.”

“Please, do so.”

“Where am I?” Elizabeth murmured, but Kathryn heard her and ran to her side. Her throat felt raspy, as if she had swallowed a handful of sand, and she felt lightheaded.

“Hi, Honey,” Janeway said softly, looking at her with relief in her eyes, “How do you feel?”

“I want to go home!” she cried.

“Alright, Baby, we’ll go home soon, okay. Let me speak with the Doctor really quick.”

“No, don’t go!” she cried even harder.

“Ok, Sweetie Pie, I won’t go anywhere. Come here, baby,” She said picking her up in her arms. Elizabeth nestled her head in the crook of Kathryn’s neck. She felt the soft vibrations coming from her throat when she spoke to the Doctor to let him know she was leaving and she would call him if she needed anything.

Three days later, Kathryn sat on the Bridge next to a less pummeled Chakotay. The swelling on his face had gone down and his blue eye had begun to recuperate its natural color. It was a quiet day so far, Elizabeth was on the holodeck with Naomi and Icheb, Seven was ten decks up and everything seemed under control. Today they were studying some kind of temporal rift.

“Captain, I’m detecting nadion discharges on the other side of the rift,” Tuvok said, looking down at the readings.

“Weapon’s fire?” Chakotay asked.

“It’s possible. The signature appears to be Klingon” Kathryn and Chakotay looked at each other.

“Red Alert!” was Janeway’s command.

“There’s a vessel coming through the rift!” Tuvok emphasized.

“Klingon?” Chakotay asked.

“No, Federation,” Tuvok said, observing as a Federation shuttle flied out the rift.

“Captain, we’re being hailed,” interrupted Harry.

“On screen,” ordered Janeway.

She couldn’t believe her eyes. She looked to Chakotay, he too was awestruck. From the viewscreen an older version of herself looked back at her. Her hair was white, her face wrinkled, and she wore a red suit with an admiral’s insignias on the collar.

“Recalibrate your deflector to emit and anti-tachyon pulse. You have to seal that rift!”

“It’s usually considered polite to introduce yourself before you start giving orders,” said Janeway as soon as she was able to speak.

“Captain, a Klingon vessel is coming through,” interrupted Tuvok.

“Close the rift! In case you didn’t noticed, I outrank you, Captain. Now do it!” She did as asked and _Voyager_ closed the rift, stopping the Klingons in the process.

“I did as you asked,” said Kathryn looking straight at her older doppelgänger, “Now, tell me what the hell is going on.” The Admiral looked back at her.

“I’ve come to bring _Voyager_ home.”

Sometime later, Kathryn stood in the transporter room. Tuvok and Chakotay were by her side as always.

“Welcome aboard,” she said, looking directly at her doppelgänger for the first time in person.

“It’s good to be back.”

 

 

“Come on, Icheb! You’re too slow!” Naomi yelled as she ran through the hallways. She and Icheb tried as hard as possible to follow along.

“Wait up, Naomi! You’re going too fast!” Elizabeth complained, “We’re going to get in trouble.”

“No, we’re not, come on!” And she kept on running, loosing herself on _Voyager’_ s interminable hallways.

“She’s crazy,” commented Elizabeth looking at Icheb.

“Indeed!” he confirmed, “Alright, Elizabeth, I must get to Astrometrics. I’ll see you around.”

“Wait, don’t go. Do you think you can take me with Captain Janeway? I don’t know the ship very well.”

“Computer, locate Captain Janeway.”

“Captain Janeway is in her ready room,” the computer replied.

“Ok, Come on.”

“Fresh coffee?” the Admiral asked. They were in Kathryn’s ready room and she had just replicated a cup of her strongest blend.

“Would you like a cup?”

“No, I gave it up years ago. I only drink tea now. I told the curator at the museum that if he wanted to make the ready room more authentic, he should always keep a steaming pot of coffee on the desk.”

“ _Voyager’_ s in a museum?”

“ _Voyager_ is a museum, on the grounds of the Presidio. On a clear morning you can see Alcatraz from here,” she said walking to the viewport.

“You made it back to Earth.” Kathryn deducted.

“Unfortunately, our favorite cup took a bit of a beating along the way. It was damaged during a battle with the Fen Domar.”

“Who?”

“You’ll run into them in a few years.”

“You know what?” Janeway said, “I shouldn’t be listening to details about the future.”

“Oh, the Almighty Temporal Prime Directive! Take my advice, it’s less of a headache if you just ignore it.” Kathryn was scandalized.

“You’ve obviously decided to, or you wouldn’t be here.”

“A lot’s happened to me since I was you.”

“Well, I’m still me, and this is still my ship. So, no more talk about what’s going to happen until I decide otherwise. Understood?”

“Alright,” the Admiral gave up, “let’s talk about the past. Three days ago, you detected elevated neutrino emissions in a nebula in grid 986. You thought it might be a way home. You were right. I’ve come to tell you to take _Voyager_ back to that nebula.”

“It was crawling with Borg,” the younger woman refuted.

“I’ve brought technology that’ll get us past them.” The older woman’s blue eyes bore straight into Kathryn’s soul. “Oh, I don’t blame you for being skeptical, but if you don’t trust yourself, who can you trust?”

“For the sake of argument, let’s say I believe everything you’re telling me. The future you come from sounds pretty good. _Voyager’_ s home, I’m an Admiral. There are ways to defend against the Borg. My ready room even gets preserved for posterity. “

“So, what would you want to tamper with such a rosy timeline?” Interrupted the Admiral, “To answer that I would have to tell you more than you want to know. But suffice it to say, if you don’t do what I’m suggesting, it’s going to take you another sixteen years to get this ship home, and there are going to be casualties along the way. I know exactly what you’re thinking.”

“You’ve also become a telepath?” mocked Janeway.

“I used to be you, remember? You’re asking yourself, ‘Is she really who she says she is or is this just a deception?’ For all you know, I could be a member of species 8472 in disguise. Have your people examine my shuttle. Tell them to take a close look at the weapons systems and the armor technology.  In the meantime, the Doctor can confirm my identity.”

Just as the Admiral finished talking the doorbell rang. The two Janeways looked at one another.

“Come in!” said the younger Janeway. She was surprised to see Icheb standing in the doorway. “May I help you, Young Man?” she asked. From behind Icheb’s long stature came Liz’s small body with a shy smile. She wore a clay-colored overall on top of a light-blue turtle neck, her hair was half down with a small, blue satin bow.

Icheb walked out without saying a word and Liz was left standing there, looking at both older women with a confused look in her face.

“Liz, Sweetheart, what are you doing here? Do you need anything?” The younger of the two knelt in front of her to look her straight in her eye. The little girl did not speak, just stood there petrified.

“Baby, it’s all right,” Kathryn took her arms carefully and softly to assuage her, “This is Admiral Janeway, there is nothing to fear, Love.” She looked up from the girl to the Admiral, her face wore a look of horror, tenderness, and confusion all mixed into one. She turned back to the child taking up her lithe frame into her arms and sitting her on her hip.

“Admiral,” she said, “I trust you remember the way to our sick bay.”

“My scans of the Admiral’s cerebral cortex turned up something interesting.” They were in sickbay, the Captain and him. Earlier that day, he’d made sure the Admiral was in full health and ran a couple examinations in the process.

“What is it?”

“I’m not sure. I’ve never seen this kind of implant before.”

“Alien technology?” Janeway suggested.

“The micro circuitry has a Starfleet signature.”

“Off course it does,” another voice, so familiar yet so strange, turned back.

“Admiral?!” The EMH jumped.

“You invented it. Twelve years ago, from my perspective.”

“I’m sorry, Admiral, I didn’t realize,” he apologized.

 “What, that I was eavesdropping?” said the woman boring his eyes right into his soul (if he had one), “I might be old, but my hearing is still excellent, thanks to your exemplary care over the years.”

The hologram looked at her with a thoughtful expression.

“So, this implant I’m going to invent… what does it do?”

“It’s a synaptic transceiver. It allows me to pilot a vessel equipped with a neural interface.”

“Fascinating!” The Doctor was truly intrigued, and his ego kicked in, “Tell me, what other extraordinary breakthroughs am I going to make?”

“Doctor!” interrupted the Captain.

“Sorry, Captain, but you can’t blame a hologram for being curious,” he defended.

“Just finish your report.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” he complied, “My scans indicate the two of you are genetically identical. The Admiral is you, approximately twenty-six years from now.” Just as he finished saying so, Seven of Nine walked into sick bay.

“Hello, Seven,” said the Admiral and the steel look in her eyes softened as she looked at the former Borg whom replied with a small head nod and approached the Captain and handing her a PADD.

“The technology aboard the Admiral’s ship is impressive. Much of it appears to have been designed to defend against the Borg.”

“Could we install these systems on _Voyager?_ ” Captain Janeway asked. The Admiral kept looking at Seven, as if reminiscing something that was not there anymore.

“The stealth technology is incompatible,” the blond-haired woman replied, hands behind her back as usual, “but I believe we can adapt the armor and weapons.”

They looked at one another for a second. Then, the Admiral spoke; her words a challenge at her younger self.

“Well, Captain?” Janeway thought about it for a moment, then ordered.

“Do it!”

Later that evening, after recording her personal log, Kathryn sat in the loveseat right in front of the viewport, head lost in the stars.

“Mommy!” she heard a little squeal and ran off to the bedroom, where Elizabeth was shaking with another nightmare. She gathered the kid into her arms and pulled her close.

“There, there. Mommy’s here, Love, you’re all right.” She had decided, she would adopt Elizabeth.

The next morning, the woman and child sat together in the Mess Hall for breakfast. Kathryn, as per usual, had a cup of black coffee in front of her and a PADD in her hand. Elizabeth had a piece of toast with some eggs and a glass of milk in front of her.

“Mom?” Liz said. That little squeaky voice calling her ‘mom’ made her morning. They talked about this the night before and Liz had no objections.

“Yes, Love,” Kathryn took a sip of her coffee.

“Why does the Admiral look so much like you? Is she your mother?”

“No, Honey, she’s not my mother. Grandma Gretchen is all the way in the Alpha Quadrant, and so is your aunt Phoebe. The Admiral looks like me because, apparently she is me.”

“I don’t get it. What do you mean she is you? Aren’t _you_ you?”

“Well, Sweetie that’s a very long story. She is me, but she comes from the future.” Kathryn sat the PADD back down on the table looking at her daughter as she took yet another sip of coffee.

“But I still don’t get it!”

“Don’t beat yourself, baby, neither do I. Aside from that, Honey, are you completely sure you want me to adopt you?”

“Why wouldn’t I want that? I just have one condition, Mom.”

“Oh?” Kathryn was taken aback.

“That you adopt Icheb as well. He’s a very smart boy, and he’s all alone. What would become of him when we get back to the Alpha Quadrant?”

“Yes, sweetheart, you’re very right. Are you sure you are not a member of some alien race that the younger they are the wiser,” she smiled, and Liz smiled back.

“Plus, he would make a great big brother, Mom.”

“Alright, young lady, you’ve already convinced me. Now, finish your breakfast.”

Icheb was surprised to say the least. The Captain had sent for him and had him reported to her ready room. He was surprised to see Elizabeth there as well, sitting on her lap.

“Please, sit down, Icheb.” He complied.

“What I want to talk to you about is you. By the looks of things, we might have found a way home. I wanted to talk to you about adoption.”

“Adoption?”

“Yes, Icheb. I want to be your mother, at the very least until you get into the Academy. My point is… Earth is a very big place, full of people from unusual parts of the galaxy. I don’t want you to be alone,” she looked down at Elizabeth, “I don’t want any of you to be alone in such an isolating place.”

“…”

“You don’t have to answer me now. Think is over and let me know what you decide.”

“Will that be all, Captain? I promised Naomi I’d take her swimming on the holodeck.” The Captain nodded, and he walked out, feeling confused and happy and, at the same time, afraid.

She’d had a hell of a day. The Admiral and her had a small disagreement when she tried to take over her Bridge. She called her aside, to the hallway, where she revealed something that had wacked her out of orbit. Seven was going to die and she would marry Chakotay. Neither of them would ever be the same again.

Kathryn didn’t know what else to do. She didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry, whether to throw something at a bulkhead or start running like a maniac through the Jeffries tubes.

“Mom?”

“Yes, Darling?”

“Are you okay?”

“Frankly no, Baby, I had a long day.”

“Icheb asked me if he could come over for dinner. He said he had something important to talk to us about.”

“Do you think it’s probably about his adoption?”

“I don’t know, but he was really nervous. I told him that it was okay, I hope you don’t mind.”

“No, that’s perfect, baby girl. What do you want dinner to be?”

“How about Bolian Pasta? There’s absolutely no way you can mess up that.”

“Geez, thank you for the vote of confidence!” Kathryn bit back sarcastically. Liz giggled and climbed unto her lap.

“Can we read _Alice in Wonderland_ tonight?”

“Did you finish _Great Expectations_?” Liz nodded, “Already?” Liz nodded again. Kathryn ran her hand through her curly, auburn hair and planted a soft kiss on her cheek. In a way, Elizabeth completed her in a way she couldn’t describe it. She was a mother for fuck’s sake! She hadn’t given birth to her, but she was her daughter in the full extent of the word.

Icheb stood at the doorstep of the Captain’s quarters. Visibly anxious, he tugged and rearranged his clothes and hair. Once he was satisfied with his looks he pressed the doorbell and waited.

“Enter!” came Captain Janeway’s voice and the door slid open. She stood there, looking very different than the woman he’d initially met when he boarded _Voyager_ for the first time. Her uniform jacket and turtleneck had been kicked aside, and she wore the gray undershirt and her uniform pants. Next to her was Elizabeth. She was clad in a clay-colored overall and a wine-colored shirt, her auburn, long hair was combed into a ponytail.

“Icheb!” she squealed and ran to take his hand to drag him inside. He let himself be tugged, offering no resistance.

After some thoughtful consideration he had decided that getting adopted by the Captain would be a wise enough choice. She could help him with getting into Starfleet Academy, and he couldn’t think of another woman he would be prouder to call “mother” than the Captain herself. He’d always looked up to her as a role model; always strong and dignified.

“Please,” she said, “come in and make yourself comfortable.” He could tell she too was nervous. Icheb observed as she finished setting up the table. This maternal version of the Captain obscure to him and to the rest of the crew, in fact. He’d seen many of her interactions with Naomi, however they didn’t compare to this Kathryn. He observed as Kathryn interacted with Elizabeth; mother and daughter indeed.

“Alright, Icheb,” Elizabeth’s voice pulled him out of his head and made him blink for a few seconds, “Come on, dinner’s ready.” And she tugged at his hand and he again left himself be tugged without any resistance.

Icheb had agreed to be adopted. She was over the roof, but at the same time she was frightened by what might come out of this attempt to go home. It was ludicrous and chaotic at best. Her older self had warned her about it.

She warned the kids over dinner. No need for her to hide that fact away from them. Icheb was old enough to understand, and in case that it all went to shit they needed to have some backup plans, as a family. She warned them to stay together and in the ready room at all times, until she gave the all-clear or red alert was canceled; only then could they come out.

Icheb told her he would take care of Liz, to go peacefully and do what had to be done to get the crew back home. In that instant, she fell so proud of him. He was so mature and comprehensive it almost brought tears to her eyes. Almost.

What did brought tears to her eyes though was seeing Chakotay and Seven together. The way he looked at her, the way he touched her, the way he spoke to her…. God, how she wished it was her in her place! In that moment she wanted to cry herself to nonexistence, but she couldn’t. She had to keep a straight face for the remainder of their journey; even if she was dying inside, even if she was wounded beyond repair.

“Mother,” Icheb’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts.

“Yes, Icheb?” she was there, but not really there.

“I was thinking, what if it doesn’t go as planned?” They were talking just the two of them, Liz had gone to bed and Icheb was brushing up on some quantum physics for a test he had in the morning. Kathryn had been helping him.

“Why the sudden question?” He shrugged.

“Well, if it doesn’t go as planned, then we’re toast.” Icheb smiled a little and continued reading from his book. Kathryn looked at the chronometer on the wall. It was quite late.

“Alright, Young Man, it is quite late. Off to bed with you,” she said looking at him lovingly.

“But, Mother, I don’t feel ready yet!” Icheb protested but it was in vain.

“You’ve studied enough for one night. Let it sink in, you’ll be fine tomorrow,” Kathryn admonished and took the textbook away, dropping it on the coffee table. Icheb stood up and fixed his clothes.

“At what time is your exam tomorrow?”

“At 0900 hours, Mother.”

“Very well, I want you in the mess hall at 0800 hours for breakfast, no excuses.”

“Yes, Mother,” the teen said, and she leaned in to give him a kiss before he walked out of her quarters and to the cargo bay to regenerate.

Kathryn walked into the bedroom to find Liz curled up and reading. She laughed quietly and looked at her little bookworm.

“I thought you’d be asleep by now,” she said softly, “What are you reading?” Elizabeth showed her the book.

“Well, well, looks like my little bookworm has upgraded from _Alice in Wonderland_ and _Mary Poppins_ to _Wuthering Heights._ What do you say, Peanut? Do you like it?”

“It is quite interesting.”

“Well, Peanut, you happen to be holding one of my favorite books. A classic from the XIX century.” The little girl’s eyes filled with wonder. “Alright, enough! To bed with you, young lady.” And she took the book away, marking the page and sliding it back in the shelf.

As Kathryn took her place in the bed Elizabeth slid back in and curled herself over her chest.

“Goodnight, Mommy. I love you.” Said the child between yawns and languid eyes.

“I love you, too. Goodnight, Little One.” _Oh, great,_ she thought, _Now I’m beginning to sound like Deanna’s mother!_ She laughed internally and drew the child close to her chest, but her eyes didn’t close. She kept wondering about the next morning and thinking about the thousands of things that could, possibly, go wrong. She kept thinking about her crew and the hundreds of lives that were at stake. They had everything to lose if this didn’t work.

 

The next morning, she woke up to the insistent computerized voice that could only correspond to her alarm. She groaned and jumped out of bed, running to the bathroom for a quick shower before Liz woke up. She was overwhelmed and tired, having slept less than six hours. It was okay, though, because the last thing she needed before confronting the Borg was patience.

She lagged to the replicator and ordered a cup of coffee, black of course. She’d need at the very least three cups to get through this day of the devil. As she took her very first sip of the day, she listened for the little light step of a certain little girl behind her and smiled. She and Icheb were her only source of sunshine on such a cloudy day.

“Morning, Mommy,” she said sleepily.

“Morning, Baby,” she answered, “Hurry up and get ready, we have to meet Icheb for breakfast at eight. He has a very important exam at nine and I have to get to the bridge.”

“Yes, mommy,” Liz replied groggily as she walked to the sonic shower, leaving Kathryn to her thoughts and her coffee.

The sudden tweet of the doorbell made her jump, and she was surprised to see her first officer behind the tritanium alloy door.

“Got a minute?’ He asked tentatively.

“Sure, what can I help you with, Commander?”

“Kathryn, with all due respect, I hope I don’t have to remind you of what’s at stake if all this doesn’t go as planned.” The captain placed her mug of steaming coffee, now half-empty, on top of the table.

“Don’t worry, Chakotay, I’ve gone through every single catastrophic scenario in my mind over and over.”

“Uh-oh,” he said, looking at her conspicuously, “You didn’t sleep, did you?”

“What gave it away?” If sarcasm were a weapon, Chakotay would be dead.

“You’re cranky, you only get cranky when you don’t get enough sleep.” She chuckled.

“Then I live cranky, cause running this ship barely allows me to sleep.”

“So, how many hours?”

“Three, four tops.” Chakotay grimaced.

“Alright, that’s it!” he said, “We’re stopping this madness right now!” And he turned to walk out of her quarters to go God knows where.

“No, wait!” She grabbed his wrist to stop him. He turned around to meet her eyes and electricity zapped between them, sending butterflies to Kathryn’s stomach.

“Let’s continue with this plan for now, in the extreme event that we need to abort it we’ll take the open corridor back to the Delta Quadrant…”

“Mom?” Liz interrupts before Kathryn can finish the phrase, “Good morning, Commander.”

“Yes, Sweetie?”

“Can you braid my hair?”

“Sure, Darling, go get me a hairbrush and a scrunchie; quick as you can.” The child disappeared into the bedroom and both adults were left alone once again.

“So, you’re ‘Mom’ now, huh?” He asked, quite surprised by the interactions between Kathryn and the little girl.

“Yes, I’ve decided to adopt her as well as Icheb,” Chakotay’s jaw dropped, “That I have to give credit where is due; it was Liz’s idea. But she’s right. They were both alone and if this worked they would be all alone in a world full of indifference and if it failed they would also be alone, just in the middle of nowhere. Elizabeth is barely six, she needs someone to take care of her. Icheb is sixteen and he too needs someone to guide him to make the right choices for him and everyone around him. So, I decided to step in and be a mother to both.”

“You know what you’re doing is very noble, right?” He looked at her and the swam of butterflies in her stomach got out of control.

“Believe me, Chakotay, is the least I can do.” Kathryn took a sip of her coffee. Elizabeth walked in with Hairbrush and scrunchie in hand and gave it to Kathryn. The woman sat on the sofa by the viewport and the little girl stood patiently in front of her as she waited for her mother to do her hair.

“Read anything interesting lately, Liz?” Chakotay asked.

“I started reading _Wuthering Heights_ last night.” Chakotay’s jaw dropped once more.

“It is not possible that you already finished the two books I helped you replicate!”

“Oh, believe me, Commander, Elizabeth can certainly give you and I a run for our money when there are books involved.” Kathryn commented as she bushed the girl’s hair.

“A little bookworm, just like your mother, eh?”

“Oh, she certainly is.”

Kathryn laughed softly, sending chills down Chakotay’s spine. Right here, right now, she was the most beautiful woman in the world. If Chakotay had any doubts left about her nobility, today he’d put an end to them. She was willing to sacrifice herself for her crew and her children.

She looked happy. This was a new side from her he’d never seen before, and Spirits, how he liked it.

 

“Mr. Paris, take us in,” she ordered, sitting majestically in the Captain’s chair.

“Aye, Captain,” Tom echoed back from his post at the helm. He was considerably nervous, not the usual bubbly Tom Paris that would make a joke at the Borg’s expense. Chakotay was expecting something along the lines of “Here’s a book never written: All About Robots, by Cy Borg,” but it never came. Maybe it had to do with the fact that B’Elanna had gone into labor earlier that morning before Kathryn called him to the bridge.

“The Admiral has succeeded, Captain,” Seven chimed in, “The conduit’s shielding is destabilizing.”

“Now, Mr. Tuvok.” At the sound of her voice, Tuvok fired three torpedoes behind them. As the hub started to come undone, a Borg sphere coming out of God-knows- where started firing at _Voyager._

“Aft armor is down to six percent,” reported the Vulcan Security Chief looking at the readings on his console.

“Hull breaches on decks six through twelve,” followed Harry.

“I can’t stay ahead of them, Captain,” warned Tom from his post with something similar to desperation in his eyes.

“The armor is failing,” Tuvok again.

“Where’s the nearest aperture?” He asked, turning his face slightly to take a peak at Kathryn. There was determination in her eyes, however, she was taciturn.

“Approximately thirty seconds away, but it leads back to the Delta Quadrant.” Seven said. Kathryn looked towards Tom.

“Mr. Paris, prepare to adjust your heading.”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“What the hell is it?” Admiral Paris barked looking at the strange subspace distortion that had formed unexpectedly. Lieutenant Barclay couldn’t believe his eyes.

“A trans warp aperture. It’s less than a light year from Earth.”

“How many Borg vessels?” a female officer asked, seeing the phenomenon without moving from her post.

“We can’t get a clear reading,” replied the Lieutenant, “But the graviton emissions are off the scales.”

The Admiral studied the situation.

“I want every ship in range to converge at those coordinates now,” he ordered without taking his eyes off the viewscreen.

“Yes, Sir.”

Admiral Paris observed as other Starfleet vessels, including a Galaxy class, gathered. An officer addressed him.

“We’ve got eighteen ships in position, nine more on the way.”

“Open a channel,” he ordered.

“Open, Sir,” confirmed Barclay.

“This is Admiral Paris,” he said, hands tucked behind his back, “Use all necessary force. I repeat, all necessary force.”

“Sir, there’s a vessel coming through,” Barclay cut in as the Borg sphere arrived at a barrage of phaser fire.  The Admiral and his crew at Starfleet Command observed as the Sphere exploded from the inside out.

“Cease fire!” he ordered. There was something else, another ship flying from the debris. _Voyager._

The shaking and rattling the ship had been suffering since they entered the hub stopped and everything went still.

“Mr. Paris, what’s our position?” Janeway asked rising slowly from the chair and walking to the center of the Bridge.

“Right where we expected to be.”

“The trans-warp network has been obliterated, Captain,” confirmed Seven with Chakotay standing right by her side.

“We’ll celebrate later,” Kathryn said, turning to the Vulcan Chief of Security, “Mr. Tuvok?” Tuvok assented and pressed a combination on his console, consequently releasing a torpedo. The Borg sphere imploded.

Once out of the debris left behind by the implosion, Kathryn almost came undone when she saw the flotilla; Starfleet, no doubt.

“We did it,” she said softly, but high enough for the rest of the bridge crew to hear her. Everyone stood there, silent and looking at each other. From the corner of her eye, Kathryn could’ve sworn she saw Seven and Chakotay let out a breath, both at once. There was a sharp pang on her gut, an incredible desire to cry, to let out all that she’d been withholding for the past eight years.

“We’re being hailed,” said Harry, voice nearly faltering.

“On screen,” she said, and was met by the inquisitive faces of Admiral Paris, Lieutenant Barclay, and an officer she didn’t recognize, “Sorry to surprise you, next time we’ll call ahead.”

“Welcome back,” said the stout figure that was Admiral Paris through the viewscreen.

“It’s good to be here,” Janeway reassured.

“How did you…”

“It’ll all be in my report, Sir.”

“I look forward to it.” And the transmission ended.

Kathryn took a big breath and looked into the gentle mantle of darkness that was space. One hand at her hip, the other one resting just a little bit over her shoulder and close to her neck she whispered a silent thank you to her older self, now confined to oblivion.

The comm chirped and the familiar voice of the EMH came through.

“Sickbay to the bridge.” A soft baby cry came through as well, making Harry chuckle. There was a slight surprise in Tom’s eyes.

“Doctor to Lieutenant Paris. There’s someone here who’d like to say hello.” Kathryn smiled widely at him.

“You’d better get down there, Tom.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” Tom stood and ran for the turbolift. The helm was left unattended and she shifted slightly to look at Chakotay.

“Mr. Chakotay,” she said, pointing at the helm with her hand facing palm up, “The helm.”

“Aye, Captain.”

“Set a course… for Home.” She said with the faintest of smiles, watching as the flotilla escorted them towards the blue orb she’d been obsessed over the entire time they were stranded in the Delta Quadrant.

 

It would be a couple of days until they reached the star base, but what was a couple of days compared to a whole seven years stranded in the middle of nowhere?

Kathryn decided she’d had enough emotions for one day. She needed to turn in, have a cup of coffee and regenerate. She also wanted to check in on the kids.  

Liz and Icheb both sat in the couch by the viewport in her ready room. Liz sat with her knees up, Kathryn’s old copy of _Wuthering Heights_ splayed on her hands. Icheb sat with an arm behind the back of the sofa and a leg crossed, with a Quantum Mechanics textbook.

Elizabeth saw her first and didn’t delayed but a jiff to jump from the couch and into her arms. She received her with a tired smile. Icheb noticed just a moment later and looked at her inquisitively.

“We made it!” Kathryn voiced the answer he was looking for, “We are back in the Alpha Quadrant.” With Elizabeth safely clinging to her hip she walked over to the bulkhead next to her desk and pushed a button. The thin plastic pane that covered the viewport rose up and locked in place, allowing a full view of Earth from space.

“There it is, Icheb… Earth, at last.” There was wonder in Liz’s eyes. Icheb remained speechless, “It’ll be two more days before reaching the starbase, but we’ve made it back home. In three days’ time, you’ll be meeting your grandmother.”

“Will she be waiting for us?” Liz asked.

“Most certainly yes, in her last letter she said she couldn’t wait to meet you and your brother.” She ruffled Icheb’s hair playfully.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Part II

Part 2  
He tossed and turned in bed trying to fall asleep, but it was impossible. There was something bothering him, and he didn’t know what it was. In merely a few hours they would be landing in the main yard of Starfleet Academy, their friends and family and an entire country would be waiting to welcome them back home. He needed to be fresh and awake to take the helm in the morning, but he couldn’t get himself to close his eyes.   
“I can feel you tossing and turning, Flyboy,” said his Klingon wife, eyes still closed.   
“Sorry,” Tom said into the air and turned to spoon her, an arm around her waist. He’d barely managed to close his eyes when Miral’s now familiar cries woke him up. B’Elanna groaned, opening her eyes reluctantly.   
“I’ll go,” Tom offered and disappeared into the contiguous room.   
As Tom changed a wet diaper, he tried figuring out what bothered him so much. Everything had come out as asked and they were back in the Alpha Quadrant. Their crew was intact. They were alive. What more could he ask for?   
Then it hit him. The dynamics among the Command Team was nowhere normal. Usually, Kathryn and Chakotay would be sitting, or standing for that matter, side by side. They were always together. But today, in that bridge, the air was sharp and full of something Tom couldn’t discern. Chakotay didn’t stood next to Kathryn, but next to Seven instead. Indeed, since the Admiral arrived to Voyager, Tom could feel a certain concern lingering right behind Kathryn’s eyes. One thing was clear, Kathryn Janeway wasn’t happy; at least not completely.  
So, the next morning, in the mess hall during breakfast, he engaged Harry’s participation to help him find out what was going on between the two of them. There was also the matter about the betting pool. Now, six years later he regretted it with all he was. What the hell were they supposed to give people, now that rations were out of the question, if rumors turned out to be true? Even more so if there were more than one winner?

 

B’Elanna rolled her eyes at Tom and Harry. She was sitting at a table, eating and feeding Miral from a bottle at the same time, listening as Tom and Harry came up with some ludicrous idea to get Chakotay and the Captain together. They were like little children.   
“How old are you, three?” she spat.  
“I’ve been called worst,” Harry admitted.  
“Seven called me a ‘fucking child’ once,” said Tom. Harry burst out laughing, sending a mouthful of water clear across the room and hitting Chell in the process.  
“Sorry, Chell,” he apologized, barely trying to hold his laughter.  
“Right, Ensign. Next time, try and keep the water in your mouth.” He walked away, and Harry burst in laughter once again.  
“I didn’t know Seven to be one to curse somebody out,” B’Elanna said laughing lightly at Tom’s revelation, “What exactly did you do to her, Flyboy?”  
“Why does everything have to come back to me? All I ever did was replicate a ping-pong ball and a paddle and bounce it around as I walked.” Harry laughed harder. Tom punched him lightly on the arm.  
“Ow!” Harry complained.  
“Quit being such a sissy, Harry, I barely touched you!”   
“He’s got you there, Harry,” the Captain’s voice made Tom turn around.   
“Captain!” Harry jumped.  
“Carry on, Ensign, I’m just passing by.”   
“Last rounds around the ship?” B’Elanna asked, looking up from the baby to her.   
“I guess you can call it that. How’s motherhood treating you?”  
“Well, considering the fact that I haven’t slept in three days.... I’m okay, thank you, Captain.”  
“Kathryn, please, we are not exactly under a command structure anymore. I know what it feels, I’ve got two of my own. Thankfully mine are way past that age.” The boys looked confused.  
“I didn’t know you had kids, Kathryn. How old are they?”  
“One’s six and the other is sixteen.” Tom brought a chair from a neighboring empty table for Kathryn to sit down. She did so, back straight, the posture of a queen.  
“Doesn’t that mean they were very little when you were assigned on the mission?”  
“Not exactly, they were young, but I didn’t know then yet.” The boys looked even more confused now.  
“I’m afraid I am not following, Cap... Kathryn.”  
“I’ve decided to adopt Icheb and Elizabeth,” she revealed. 

Kathryn was surprised to see Chakotay standing at the door. She thought he’d be in cargo bay two by now, with Seven. She was just finishing packing some books into boxes when the bell caught her off guard.   
“Hey,” he said, “Got a minute?”  
“For you? Always,” she answered and invited him to sit down, “tell me, what’s up?”  
“I got to talk to you.”  
“About?” Her brow furrowed.  
“It’s about us, I feel like we’ve grown distant. This past year has been insane, and I feel like we’ve started to pull away from each other. Wherever we go, whatever we do, there’s this huge gap between you and me, and I don’t want to leave Voyager without mending that.”  
“What are you going on about, Chakotay?”  
“I was listening to the boys talk this morning, during breakfast. They didn’t see me, I was three tables away from them. They were talking about a plan...”  
“Chakotay, the boys always have a plan for everything, I thought you’d know that by now,” interrupted the woman looking at him with a smug smile.  
“…to get us together. There was also something about a betting pool.”   
“Let me guess, Tom?” Chakotay nodded, “You know Tom has a betting pool for everything, Chakotay, why would this be any different?”  
“Alright, Kathryn, let me be blunt,” he took her hands in his, looked down for a couple of seconds and then into her eyes, “I am in love with you, Kathryn Janeway.”

“And well, do you love her?” B’Elanna stared back at him inquisitively, leaning over with her forearms on her knees.  
“Of course I do!”  
“Then what in the multiverse are you waiting for?! Go tell her!”   
“I can’t!” he sighed and slumped carelessly on the couch, in front of her.  
“Now, you listen to me, Chakotay; either you go and tell her on your own or I will drag you there myself! Do you know just how much she is suffering?” Chakotay looked down, hiding his face from her half-Klingon friend, “There is this emptiness in her eyes, this resignation. Why do you keep on doing this to her? Why do you keep on doing it to yourself?”  
“Alright, enough! I’ve heard enough! Don’t you think I know that already, B.?”   
“Look, I’m not here to berate you, I’m here as your friend and not your executioner.”  
“I risked all of this once, and it nearly destroyed me. I don’t want to go through that all over again.”  
“Just because you played with fire once and burned yourself does not mean it will happen again!!!” B’Elanna shouted, exasperated. Chakotay said nothing and looked down. There was a bitter minute of silence, then he spoke again.  
“She’s adopting the kids, Icheb and Liz,” he smiled weakly.  
“I know. She told us this morning.”  
“She told me she didn’t want them to be alone in a world so full of indifference.”  
“Sometimes I wonder how she can still be so modest and benevolent despite of the blows life has sent her way.”  
“She rolls with them, that’s how. She would’ve made a great Maquis, wouldn’t she?”  
“Yes, she would’ve. Not the kind of woman you want to mess with, though.” Chakotay chuckled.  
“For what is worth,” B’Elanna added, “She really does love you. I can tell.”  
“Well, whatever happens, is not like she’s irreplaceably perfect, right?” She’s just …so…stubborn.”  
“She can be bitchy.”  
“Impetuous… Brave,” he spoke inattentively.  
“Noble-hearted.”  
“How could I ever get over her?”  
“I’ll let you know.” Chakotay turned to look at B’Elanna at the sudden revelation, eyes wide like plates.  
“What?!”  
“Alright, Pal, let’s keep this between me and you, yeah? If Tom find out I won’t hear the end of it until Miral turns twenty.”   
“Sometimes I wonder how you put up with him. Frankly, when you decided to marry him I was truly surprised. Given the volatile nature of your relationship, one might’ve expected homicide rather than matrimony.” B’Elanna threw a cushion at him and it hit him right on his face.  
“Would you watch it? You can take somebody’s head off with that thing.”  
“Unless you want me to knock you unto the middle of the next millennium, you better back off!”   
“Ooh, I’m so afraid!” He feigned, mocking her, then burst out laughing.

“Alright, Harry, what do we say?” asked Tom looking at him with a smug smile, so very like himself. Harry Kim rolled his eyes for the nth time that morning and answered.  
“That we are holding a small party to celebrate getting back to the Alpha Quadrant. Hence, it is crucial for them to be there, they are the command team after all.”  
“Very good! That was perfect!” Harry looked at him with a glazed expression.   
“You’re an asswipe, do you know that?”  
“Unfortunately, my wife reminds me of that every morning,” Tom said with a deadpan expression.   
“B’Elanna insults everyone, except the Captain.” Tom snorted.  
“You say that because you didn’t hear her whenever Janeway ordered her to eject the goddamn warp core. Man, the things that can come out of that mouth are often better left unsaid.”   
“Well, you did marry a Klingon after all.”  
“Half- Klingon!” Tom cut in.  
“Fine, fine, whatever. My point is you are a jackass, and for once in my life I am bound to concur with B’Elanna. If they demote me back to crewman because of your small dim-witted idea, I swear I won’t ever speak to you again!”  
“Geez, thanks. With friends like you, why do I want enemies? And you say that every time.”  
“Well, I’m not getting promoted either, am I?”  
“Quit whining, Harry! Let us better go over the plan.”

“Mother, are you alright?” Icheb lifted his eyes from his astrophysics textbook to look at his mother, sitting in the couch with her legs crossed, looking out into the void of space. One look at the teen and Kathryn came undone. Icheb understood she was crying, and so went on next to her.   
He took her hands lovingly and stretched them between his, looking down trying to find the correct words to say. Elizabeth came then into the room, noticing the scene.   
“Mommy? Are you okay? Why are you crying?” Her strident voice made Icheb and Kathryn turn to her.  
“Now is not the time, Liz, Mother is not feeling alright. Go get her something to drink, please.” The little girl, obedient as always, did as her brother ordered. She walked to the replicator and asked for a cup of green tea with a hint of pomegranate.   
By the time Elizabeth came back with the scorching drink, Icheb was holding Kathryn in a hug. She was still crying nonstop and Icheb was starting to get worried. Never had he seen Kathryn Janeway cry.   
This wasn’t just any kind of cry, no. This was a cry of love unrequited. This was a cry of letting go something withheld for years. This was a cry of rebellion, of not wanting to act and feel according to the norm.   
There was a sudden rush of anger running through him. Now he could truly understand what the expression “blood boiling” really meant. He got up from the couch and started for the door.  
“Icheb, where are you going?”  
“Stay here with Mom, Liz. I will be right back.” He walked out and paced outside of Commander Chakotay’s quarters. He rang the doorbell, and when the double doors slid open he lashed out at the Commander.  
“WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! DON’T YOU SEE SHE’S SUFFERING, YOU SELF-RIGHTEOUS PRICK?! YOU DON’T DESERVE HER, AND SURE AS HELL, YOU DON’T DESERVE HER CRYING OVER YOU LIKE SHE’S DOING RIGHT NOW, ASSHOLE!”  
And just like that he walked out of the Commander’s quarters and back towards the Captain’s. When he got there, he found Kathryn had stopped crying but was now holding Liz towards her as she was sitting on her lap, reading from Wuthering Heights.   
He was still fizzing with anger and walked straight to the bathroom to wash his face with cool water and try to calm down. Icheb looked at his reflection in the mirror. His ears were red, his eyes were at least two shades darker, his brow was furrowed, and his ivory complexion was rather rosy. He opened the basin and water came splashing up. We bent forward and splashed some on his face, then closed the basin and helped himself up placing his hands on top of the flat surface, head still down.   
He heard a soft knock on the door and looked up to find the reflection of Kathryn, looking at him from the threshold of the bathroom door.   
“Sweetheart, are you alright?” she asked, worry in her eyes.  
“I am undamaged, Mother.”  
“You’re angry, Icheb, don’t try to fool me. Now, tell me what’s wrong.” Icheb turned around.  
“It’s nothing, Mother, I am fine… really. I would prefer not to go into details please.”  
“Okay,” his mother gave in, “I won’t force you to tell me if you don’t want to. Now, come on. We will be landing in a half hour.”

“I love you, Kathryn Janeway.” The phrase caught her off guard; she wasn’t expecting the Commander’s visit, and especially not this kind of phrase to come out of his mouth.  
“I-I…”  
“It’s okay, Kathryn. I understand if this is too much for you. I just wanted to let you know before we took our separate ways.”  
“What brought on this?” Kathryn’s voice was merely a whisper and she kept looking down at their conjoined hands.  
“B’Elanna and Icheb.”  
“What do B’Elanna and Icheb have to do with this?”  
“Well,” he started, tugging at his ear like he did when he was nervous, “They both yelled at me.”  
“They what?” Kathryn couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  
“B’Elanna called me a coward in Klingon and Icheb called me a couple more severe insults for making you suffer. Believe me, you don’t want to know,” his tired smile became a serious expression and his eyes bore into hers, “He told me you were crying.” His hand flew up to delineate her cheek and swollen eyes with a love so profound Kathryn nearly came undone in front of him. She closed her eyes before the touch and sighed.  
“Why do you do this to me, Chakotay?”  
“You pierce my soul, Kathryn. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are lost forever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, Six years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you."  
Kathryn smiled. This was a game of theirs, to speak in book quotes. They’d made it up to pass the time when they were stranded on New Earth.  
“Persuasion,” she said, looking up to find his eyes, “Jane Austen.”  
“You never miss one, do you?” he challenged.   
Kathryn smiled wider and said in a more serious note, “Whatever our souls are made of, yours and mine are the same.”  
“Emily Brönte, Wuthering Heights.”  
“I will really miss you when we disembark. I’m assuming you’re probably going to spend some time with your sister when debriefings are over.”  
“Meh, I don’t know. It all depends on your answer in the next couple of minutes.” She looked at him for a few seconds, then he leaned in and kissed her. Kathryn didn’t pull away, but instead drew her body closer to him, lacing her arms around his neck.  
“I love you,” he said once they drew apart, “You’re beautiful. Please, forgive me?” And how could she not forgive him if he was the love of her life. 

 

Elizabeth didn’t expected Earth to be this bright. Even though she hid her face in her mother’s neck the light still blinded her. It was the good kind of light, though, and little by little she became used to the light and the welcome heat that came along with it.   
Through the corner of her eye, she saw her mother take in a deep breath and let out a smile. She didn’t miss the furtive look she shared with the Commander, either, nor the angry look in Icheb’s eyes. She observed as the rest of the crew put the ship behind them, except the Command Team. They were the last ones to abandon ship. Her mother had once revealed to her the three rules of being a Starfleet Captain; Keep your shirt tucked in, go down with the ship, never abandon a member of your crew. Words by which she would live till the end of her days.   
Kathryn moved and placed a hand on the closest bulkhead, the Commander followed, placing his on top of hers. Elizabeth saw as she closed her eyes and whispered something along the lines of “Thank you, old friend, we will miss you.”  
Elizabeth hadn’t lived in Voyager nearly as long as Naomi, or even Icheb, but she’d started to fall in love with the beauty of their metallic home. She was already used to the constant buzzling of its engines and the constant red alerts or malfunctions in engineering. She was already used to B’Elanna cursing in Klingon, or Tom pranking Tuvok, or Harry constantly complaining about his promotion. She would never understand how such an uneven crew could become such a close family.   
Kathryn put her down and searched for her hand instead. Chakotay and Icheb followed behind them. The ramp was steep for her small legs, and she struggled to keep up with her mother. Kathryn noticed and picked her up again, adjusting her on her hip. Icheb then walked next to her while Chakotay stayed at a conceivable distance behind them. 

 

As soon as her feet touched the pavement, she felt herself waver. Thankfully, Chakotay was right behind her and steadied her with his hand, supporting and unfaltering as always. She looked up at him and thanked him, no need for words between them.   
Across the yard, she saw the puzzled look in her family’s eyes. Three Starfleet Admirals stood there, among them was Owen Paris. Tom and B’Elanna standing next to him. Tom had Miral in arms, so that B’Elanna could take a break. She walked over to the couple and asked them to keep an eye on Liz for her while she talked to her superiors. Icheb stayed with them as well.   
As she crossed the Starfleet Academy courtyard, she could feel Chakotay tailing her. She waited for a few moments for him to catch up with her, then continued walking.   
“If we’re going to do this we’re going to do it together, Chakotay.”  
“As always. Have you become a telepath as well, Kathryn?”  
“Very funny, Commander.”   
“Oh, come on, it had to be at least a little bit funny!” Kathryn shook her head making a face of disapproval.   
“Trust me, Chakotay, it is not.”  
They approached the group of admirals and Chakotay tagged two steps behind her. She shook hands with each of them, a smile on her face. She gave thanks for such a display and assured many of them that she would later hand them a report. They all dispersed, and she was left then face to face with her family. 

Gretchen Janeway fixed her tired eyes at a younger version of herself. Her Katie had gained a few years up in space but seemed healthy enough for the two of them. Her eyes filled with tears and she leaned forward to take her baby into her arms. Kathryn would always be her baby, no matter how old she was, as well as Phoebe.   
She looked tired, though, as if she hadn’t slept in years. Her hair was shorter than when the mission started, and she liked the way it clung behind her ear. There was this maturity air in Kathryn’s stance which reminded her vaguely of Edward, and a determination she’d only seen in him. Like father, like daughter.   
When they pulled away, Kathryn called over for someone. An adolescent, around sixteen, started walking toward them, pulling a girl of about five or six in tow. The girl reminded her a lot of Kathryn as a child. She couldn’t understand what was happening.   
She observed patiently as Kathryn took the child in her arms, a light smile flourished in her lips as she received her, setting her on her hip. The young man stood next to her as well.  
“Mother,” she said, “I have some important people I want you to meet. This is Icheb,” she placed a hand on the teen’s shoulder, “And this is Elizabeth. Guys, say hello to Grandma Gretchen.” Kathryn smiled at her and her eyes watered slightly.   
The little girl’s eyes depicted a gleam of wonder and stretched her arms out for Gretchen to pick her up.   
“She wants you to pick her up, Ma,” Kathryn stated the obvious. Gretchen did as asked and accepted the child as Kathryn passed her over. She was surprisingly light to be so tall. Her curly auburn hair cascaded down her back and framed her face slightly, semi-held back by a blue ribbon that matched her shirt underneath a frayed pair of jean overalls.   
“Hello, Grandma Gretchen. I’m Liz,” her squeaky voice came out, making Kathryn and Phoebe chuckle. Elizabeth looked towards Gretchen’s youngest and said, “And you must be Aunt Phoebe.”  
“That I am, Little One.” Icheb stood next to her, hands tucked behind his back. His hair was greased and sleeked all the way back with a swift wave to the side. Kathryn’s hand lay on his shoulder, he towered over her by nearly a full thirty centimeters.   
“Well, Katie, looks like you can finally reach that book at the very top of your bookshelf,” Phoebe giggled at Gretchen’s comment.   
“Mother!” Kathryn covered her face with her hand momentarily, blushing with embarrassment, then crossed both arms over her chest and looked around them as if looking for someone. Her eyes encountered a man’s, dark brown and mysterious, dressed in tactical red with a strange tribal tattoo on his forehead.   
From where she was standing, Gretchen could see his face, gentle and serene. There were some bags underneath his eyes, as if he hadn’t slept a lot during the eight years on Voyager. His hair, dark as night, had the vision of a few white ones growing. His shoulders were wide and his arms strong. His hands were tucked behind his back, as if waiting to take orders from Kathryn.  
“Commander,” she heard her say, “please, come forward.” She turned towards her and Phoebe. The man joined them. “This is Commander Chakotay, my first officer, right hand and friend. Chakotay, this is my mother, Gretchen, and that’s my sister, Phoebe.”   
The man put his hand out and stretched hers, then Phoebe’s. One glance and Gretchen could recognize what she saw in his eyes earlier. There was this mix of adoration and respect, of inspiration, of love.   
“Chakotay, a pleasure.” His voice was deep and husky, low enough to make any woman’s knees weak. He was rather handsome, but Gretchen could see in the gleam of his eyes his soul was tied to a single woman.   
She didn’t miss the furtive looks that went back and forth between her daughter and the Commander, nor the side smile in Kathryn’s face when she saw him interact with Phoebe. It was as if she could sense that something was off. Something had happened between these two and Kathryn wasn’t talking about it.

He saw her again three weeks later, in a park in Indiana. She wore a pair of frayed mom jeans and a pink long-sleeve blouse. Her hair was considerably longer than before and was tied back into a ponytail. She looked so relaxed as she pushed Liz’s swing. She wasn’t Captain Janeway any more, but Kathryn Janeway instead.   
“Your turn, Mommy!” He heard Liz say to her from a distance. She refused, and he saw with a smile as Icheb picked her lithe frame up and took her to the swings. Next thing he knew she was flying in the air. Chakotay could hear her cries of joy as she laughed uncontrollably. He’d only heard her laugh like that once before, on New Earth. She was fully happy.   
His feet dragged him to her mechanically. Elizabeth noticed him and ran to say hello. Chakotay asked her to keep quiet, he wanted to surprise Kathryn. Icheb saw him and Chakotay repeated the gesture for him to keep quiet. Icheb moved away from Kathryn and Chakotay took his place instead, pushing the swing lightly.   
“I heard you had a minor mishap with the Prime Directive, Captain,” he said and saw with a smile as her face turned around to look at him, evident surprise in her eyes.   
“Minor, you say? And here I thought it was pretty major.”   
“Well, you did quit your job. Something I never could get my mind around, knowing you like I know you.”  
“I didn’t quit my job, Chakotay, I asked for a leave of absence.”   
“Might as well be the same, coming from you, Kathryn,” he refuted. She ignored the comment and changed the topic.  
“What brings you to Bloomington, Indiana, Commander?”  
“Well, you made such a beauty of it that I just had to get myself to visit it.”  
“Why do I get the feeling that isn’t the actual reason why you came to this small town in the middle of nowhere?” Chakotay tugged at his ear with a nervous smile.  
“Busted!”   
Kathryn laughed at this, that sweet chortle so natural of hers that drove him crazy every time.   
“I wanted to make sure you were okay.”  
“Well, I’m in one piece. Why don’t you cut to the chase and tell me the real reason why you’re here?” He tugged at his ear a little too hard. He was sure it would leave a mark.  
“I came to ask you and your family something important.” He observed as she bit her lip and lowered her eyes to the sandy consistency of the swing box. He helped her get down from it safely, stopping the soft rocking carefully to allow her safe passage.   
Once down, her eyes caught his. His respiration caught at the sight of those blue orbs that hunted his dreams in a constant fashion of lately. 

 

Kathryn’s amused eyes followed Elizabeth as she disappeared running after Erin. The small Irish setter pup wagged its tail and jumped up and down with such joy that was almost contagious.   
“One of Molly’s?” Chakotay asked, his hand caressing the puppy momentarily then returning to lace his fingers in hers with a smile. Kathryn confirmed it and wrapped her fingers around his. She was surprised at how well they fit together.  
“What were you going to ask me, now that the kids are gone, and I can take my eyes away from them.”  
“They are not made of glass, Kate, they are not going to break if you take your eyes away from them for two minutes.”  
“What did you call me?” she asked, trying to catch the endearment.   
“Kate, why? You don’t like it?”  
“Well, I’ll tell you something. It’s better than what the rest of the family calls me. My mother and sister call me Katie, which is acceptable to a certain degree. My aunt used to call me Kat, I always despised that nickname. Mark added the letter H to that thinking I wouldn’t recognize it. But Kate, I absolutely love it, Chakotay.”  
At the mention of Mark, Chakotay’s face turned serious, but what quickly put aside when she mentioned the last part.   
“Will you follow me back outside? I have something to give you.”  
“What?”  
“Well, you’ll have to see it for yourself,” he said, conducting her outside by placing a plump hand across the midsection of her back. She walked outside zealous but was met by the same Indiana sun and summer breeze.   
“Alright, I give up. What am I supposed to be looking at?” Her eyes met his for a split nanosecond, then listened to him as he whistled the first few bars of an old 20th century tune. She was puzzled by his strange behavior. Chakotay wasn’t one to beat around the bush and this secretive behavior was seriously starting to worry her.  
“Chakotay, please, tell me what’s going on. I’m starting to worry.”  
“Just keep walking, Kate. We’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”

“Ow! Tom, you stepped on my foot!”   
“Sorry, Ensign, that was me.”  
Harry couldn’t tell who the voice belonged to. The room was dark and cramped as hell. He could feel the oxygen begin to thin and his lungs tighten, bringing a certain heaviness to his chest.   
“How much longer do we have to stay here?” he asked.  
“Until Commander Chakotay gives the signal.” That voice he recognized as the Doctor’s.   
“Remind me again, why are we doing this?”  
“Because we wanted to get them together, remember?” Tom said.   
“This is foolish,” Harry declared.   
“No, it’s romantic,” B’Elanna cut in, “Now, shut up.”   
Just then, Chakotay walked in. Right by his side, as always, was Captain Janeway. This was a total different Janeway than the one he was used to seeing in a regular basis. She wore a light pink, long- sleeved shirt and a pair of frayed mom jeans instead of her command-red Starfleet uniform. Her hair was somewhat longer and pulled back into a messy ponytail.   
“Why is it so dark in here?” Harry heard her complain.   
“I haven’t had the chance to clean away all the dust and get rid of these ugly curtains.” Chakotay explained.   
“Wait,” she said, “You live here?”  
“I just moved in, do you like it?”  
“It is most certainly a beautiful home, Chakotay, but what brought this along?”  
“Here’s the thing, Kate. I used to be one of those people that dreamt about scaping his boring, ordinary life. Only my life was never ordinary, you see, but I failed to see just how extraordinary it really was. My world was destroyed by Cardassians, you know that, and I never imagined home was something I would miss. So, I went back. I stayed with my sister for a few days, visited the local library where I spent hours as a child, I visited every place and did everything that I used to do, but it never felt right. It wasn’t a triumphal return, Kate, home as I had known it… it was gone.   
One night I woke up with a nightmare, it wasn’t very pretty, and I started to wish I had someone I could talk to about it. My sister was next door, I could’ve woken her up, but I realized it didn’t matter at all because you weren’t there to listen. And then I realized, my home wasn’t a place but a person. I began to think my home was with you, by your side, because to me you were more than just a person. You were the place where I finally felt at home. I am one of the few privileged people to travel the world and part of the galaxy, and yet to me, you feel more like home than any place I’ve ever been.   
That’s how I knew. You, Kathryn, I must have you for my own –entirely my own. I ask you to pass through life at my side—to be my second self, and best earthly companion.”  
For the very first time since he met the woman, Harry Kim saw Kathryn Janeway’s blue eyes welled with tears. Her complexion was also rather rosy, a most contrasting shade against her porcelain skin. He recognized the last two lines that came out of his CO’s lips, but he couldn’t remember where they came from.   
“Charlotte Brönte, Jane Eyre?” Chakotay smiled, taking her hands in his.  
“You never miss one, do you?” she shook her head with a tearful smile.  
“How could I, my angry warrior, if from the very moment I saw you I knew you were meant to be my one and only? How could I ever forget the words from the very first book I leant you?”  
My angry warrior she said. Harry had never heard those words coming from neither of their mouths. He had no clue of what it was about or what it meant. Probably something from back on their time in the planet where they contracted the virus. They did seem to have a stronger bond from that time on, even of they did have their own differences in the weeks following said event.   
Chakotay got down on one knee, his hand still clasping both of hers. He took a deep breath, visibly nervous.   
“Kathryn Janeway, I love you. Will you marry me?” She pulled him up close to her and weaved her fingers into his hair.  
“Yes!” And her lips met Chakotay’s in a passionate kiss that said all words couldn’t.

There was music, applause, and cheers everywhere around them. She pulled away to see Harry and his clarinet as he came out from behind a closet playing the first few bars of Haydn’s Trumpet Concerto in the third movement. Someone threw confetti over them and hugged Kathryn firmly. She was surprised to see her mother looming in over her shoulder.   
“Mother, were you in this too?”  
“Oh, yes I was!”  
“Chakotay, is this how you knew where to find me?”  
“In my defense,” he admitted, “It was your mother who called me.” Kathryn’s eyes shifted to Gretchen.   
“Well, I am very sorry, Darling. But I rather have you looking this happy next to the man you love rather than moping around all day because you miss him.”  
“We couldn’t have possibly be that predictable!”  
“Believe me, Kathryn, you two were very predictable. Or don’t you think we didn’t pick up those furtive looks you two gave each other on the bridge?”   
She felt her cheeks burn with a blush and fixed her eyes on the floor. No wonder even Elizabeth could pick that up. Her eyes shot up to look at Chakotay.  
“You probably noticed too, didn’t you?”  
“Actually no, you did a pretty good job at hiding that.”   
“You pusillanimous bastard!” Someone yelled from the very end of the room. By the amused tone and the voice’s timbre, Kathryn concluded it was Tom.  
“Well, what do you want? If I tell her the truth she might just break me in half. Believe me, I’ve seen her take down bullies twice her size just like that. She looks little, but don’t let that misguide you. One look from her and you’ll crap your pants, Tom.” Kathryn punched him lightly on the arm, looking at him through the corner of her eye.   
“You keep it going, Mister, and you’ll really find out who’s Kathryn Janeway!”  
“Yes, Ma’am!” Chakotay took a firm stance as he took his hand to his forehead in a military antic. Kathryn smiled and leaned in to plant another kiss on his lips, she didn’t give a damn who was looking. 

“Reader, I married him. A quiet wedding we had: he and I, the parson and clerk, were alone present. When we got back from church, I went into the kitchen of the manor-house, where Mary was cooking the dinner and John cleaning the knives, and I said —”  
Elizabeth listened as her mother read the beginning of the last chapter of Jane Eyre. They were both laying in bed, Elizabeth sitting on her lap with her head on her chest reading along with her. Icheb was sitting next to them, his head on Kathryn’s shoulder. From where they stood, Liz could hear the constant murmur of the sonic shower indicating Chakotay was in the bathroom.   
Scenes like this one were common with them by now. Every night, Kathryn and the kids would gather in the master bedroom as she read them from a book. Chakotay and Kathryn were now living together. She always did like him for a father.   
Elizabeth knew with perfect accuracy what was to happen next. Now, Chakotay would come out of the bathroom, hair wet from the shower. He would walk toward them and kiss their mother softly and then take his rightful place next to his wife.   
Just as she thought, Chakotay came out of the bathroom wearing his pajamas, hair wet from the sonic shower. He threw his towel in the basket behind the door for laundering and walked to the bed, taking his rightful place next to Kathryn and planting a soft kiss on her forehead. She searched for his warmth and kept reading.   
“My tale draws to its close: one word respecting my experience of married life, and one brief glance at the fortunes of those whose names have most frequently recurred in this narrative, and I have done.

I have now been married ten years. I know what it is to live entirely for and with what I love best on earth. I hold myself supremely blest- blest beyond what language can express; because I am my husband's life as fully as he is mine. No woman was ever nearer to her mate than I am: ever more absolutely bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh. I know no weariness of my Edward's society: he knows none of mine, any more than we each do of the pulsation of the heart that beats in our separate bosoms; consequently, we are ever together. To be together is for us to be at once as free as in solitude, as gay as in company. We talk, I believe, all day long: to talk to each other is but a more animated and an audible thinking. All my confidence is bestowed on him, all his confidence is devoted to me; we are precisely suited in character-perfect concord is the result.”  
There were never words more perfectly written to describe her parents’ relationship that those written by Brontë. She was a witness of the love and devotion that they professed to each other. Her mother was never happier than when she was with him. They could both be together in a room and be perfectly comfortable without talking, just basking in each other’s presence.   
Icheb was accepted into an accelerated program at the academy, and he was about to graduate. His love for coffee, which was planted by her mother dared she say, had helped him fight through many nights of little or no sleep at all. His time on Voyager and his innate brightness were also factors in his favor.   
As per Elizabeth, she was sure she had a good life ahead of her. She had a beautiful family. Kathryn was somewhat of a queen, and she was her little princess, it didn’t matter where she’d been or what she’d done. It didn’t matter that her biological mother and her adoptive mother were Xeroxed copies of one another. And it definitely didn’t matter at all that she had a little sibling on his way soon.


End file.
